Monday, August 22, 2005
pre-homecoming anxiety
it may sound absurd. but i am actually nervous about going home, even though it will only be for 1 week. (err.. because i am now used to driving on the 'right' side of the road???)
other than not being there physically, i feel as though i never left. thanks to technology, i am in close contact with the people who matters. no major home news escaped my knowledge. in fact, friends made it a point to share transport related news with me (ha ha ha).
the thing i do not look forward is definitely the weather. also, i wonder how would i feel visiting the 'oh-so-familiar' places.
it's a pity that i am not 衣锦还乡. besides a year of personal experiences, i am actually worse than before i left. financially, i am many grands poorer. career wise - nothing. academically, i did classes that no one gives a damn. for my parents, i'm a nut case who chose to give up all the good things for a frivolous cause they cannot even understand. they had given up on me already.
i was wondering what will i say when friends asked me what have i been doing, or what's for the future. i dun even know myself. i only know starting life again in s'pore is the last option.
well, for a person who likes big picture, i guess the last sentence is all i need.
jeeze.... i am too paranoid....
other than not being there physically, i feel as though i never left. thanks to technology, i am in close contact with the people who matters. no major home news escaped my knowledge. in fact, friends made it a point to share transport related news with me (ha ha ha).
the thing i do not look forward is definitely the weather. also, i wonder how would i feel visiting the 'oh-so-familiar' places.
it's a pity that i am not 衣锦还乡. besides a year of personal experiences, i am actually worse than before i left. financially, i am many grands poorer. career wise - nothing. academically, i did classes that no one gives a damn. for my parents, i'm a nut case who chose to give up all the good things for a frivolous cause they cannot even understand. they had given up on me already.
i was wondering what will i say when friends asked me what have i been doing, or what's for the future. i dun even know myself. i only know starting life again in s'pore is the last option.
well, for a person who likes big picture, i guess the last sentence is all i need.
jeeze.... i am too paranoid....
Instant food
You cannot cook a good meal using a microwave.......
these were his exact words....... how apt.......
the situation has come to a point that i had to apologize for being over-zealous.
i have been trying to 'lock on' to the target ever since it appeared on the radar screen. however, i was angry that heaven has not been helpful. I was bitter that god (if there is one?!), has been playing trick on me, making me look like a big fool.
but when he told me that in person, yet agreeing to pick me up when i get back, i knew straight away that I am in fact very blessed.
CM, you are right, 'patience' is the word. i certainly hate microwaved food and for someone who cooks, so does he. carol was right to ask me to hold my horses.
i just have to stay cool, go home, see my folks and have a good time.
these were his exact words....... how apt.......
the situation has come to a point that i had to apologize for being over-zealous.
i have been trying to 'lock on' to the target ever since it appeared on the radar screen. however, i was angry that heaven has not been helpful. I was bitter that god (if there is one?!), has been playing trick on me, making me look like a big fool.
but when he told me that in person, yet agreeing to pick me up when i get back, i knew straight away that I am in fact very blessed.
CM, you are right, 'patience' is the word. i certainly hate microwaved food and for someone who cooks, so does he. carol was right to ask me to hold my horses.
i just have to stay cool, go home, see my folks and have a good time.
Saturday, August 06, 2005
Stand up for Singapore
my first time away from home during national day.
been to the parade many times in my life. have always enjoyed it, especially the last part, singing (or rather, shouting) all the national songs with the splendid fireworks as background 'music'.
yes, i have tons of things to say about this little red dot at the southern tip of the malayan peninsular. it is soo damn small that even the distance from my house to the city of san francisco is longer than that from Tuas to Changi - and i actually live very close to SF.
i've always been proud to be a s'porean - you all know that. not that we are no 1 in many things (in fact, when u know the world, i wouldn't go round bragging this), but it is a place that has made me who i am.
growth and learning is a continuous process. but the foundation is key. despite the much critisized censorship or spoon-feeding or hand-holding (etc etc), most of the s'poreans i met out here are so cosmopolitan that the locals only have praises for us.
we speak good english, we are warm people, we assimulated well into the local environment and yet, we are a very unique bred of people. our food is great, we are very strong in sciences and we are multi-lingual. the locals have no problem communicating with us though they are often intrigued by the singlish we used among our own breed.
a couple of us always talked about what is it like to go back to s'pore and start living there (ha ha ha, i sounded as if i've been away for that long..... but the truth is, i feel so at home this time round that i'm here. no sense of alienation). no doubt life in s'pore is only a year ago for me, honestly, i cannot imagine having to go back to it - although i always feel s'porean inside me. i'm not alone. for now, we think it is enough if we make trips home on regular basis to say hi to our folks and stay in touch with the happenings via the internet. but to lead a life back there? no, not for now at least.
it is few days to my beloved country's 40th birthday. i'm gonna miss the celebration. but as i told carol, maybe i will be there to celebrate her 50th b'day.
Happy Birthday Singapore!!
been to the parade many times in my life. have always enjoyed it, especially the last part, singing (or rather, shouting) all the national songs with the splendid fireworks as background 'music'.
yes, i have tons of things to say about this little red dot at the southern tip of the malayan peninsular. it is soo damn small that even the distance from my house to the city of san francisco is longer than that from Tuas to Changi - and i actually live very close to SF.
i've always been proud to be a s'porean - you all know that. not that we are no 1 in many things (in fact, when u know the world, i wouldn't go round bragging this), but it is a place that has made me who i am.
growth and learning is a continuous process. but the foundation is key. despite the much critisized censorship or spoon-feeding or hand-holding (etc etc), most of the s'poreans i met out here are so cosmopolitan that the locals only have praises for us.
we speak good english, we are warm people, we assimulated well into the local environment and yet, we are a very unique bred of people. our food is great, we are very strong in sciences and we are multi-lingual. the locals have no problem communicating with us though they are often intrigued by the singlish we used among our own breed.
a couple of us always talked about what is it like to go back to s'pore and start living there (ha ha ha, i sounded as if i've been away for that long..... but the truth is, i feel so at home this time round that i'm here. no sense of alienation). no doubt life in s'pore is only a year ago for me, honestly, i cannot imagine having to go back to it - although i always feel s'porean inside me. i'm not alone. for now, we think it is enough if we make trips home on regular basis to say hi to our folks and stay in touch with the happenings via the internet. but to lead a life back there? no, not for now at least.
it is few days to my beloved country's 40th birthday. i'm gonna miss the celebration. but as i told carol, maybe i will be there to celebrate her 50th b'day.
Happy Birthday Singapore!!
We are going on a summer holiday (pls sing)
several people wondered if i'm still alive - since i have not updated my blog for a while or emailed them.
i'm still in 1 piece. summer class finally ended and i am now enjoying the famed 'summer holidays'!!!
i'm still in 1 piece. summer class finally ended and i am now enjoying the famed 'summer holidays'!!!
