Monday, August 22, 2005
pre-homecoming anxiety
it may sound absurd. but i am actually nervous about going home, even though it will only be for 1 week. (err.. because i am now used to driving on the 'right' side of the road???)
other than not being there physically, i feel as though i never left. thanks to technology, i am in close contact with the people who matters. no major home news escaped my knowledge. in fact, friends made it a point to share transport related news with me (ha ha ha).
the thing i do not look forward is definitely the weather. also, i wonder how would i feel visiting the 'oh-so-familiar' places.
it's a pity that i am not 衣锦还乡. besides a year of personal experiences, i am actually worse than before i left. financially, i am many grands poorer. career wise - nothing. academically, i did classes that no one gives a damn. for my parents, i'm a nut case who chose to give up all the good things for a frivolous cause they cannot even understand. they had given up on me already.
i was wondering what will i say when friends asked me what have i been doing, or what's for the future. i dun even know myself. i only know starting life again in s'pore is the last option.
well, for a person who likes big picture, i guess the last sentence is all i need.
jeeze.... i am too paranoid....
other than not being there physically, i feel as though i never left. thanks to technology, i am in close contact with the people who matters. no major home news escaped my knowledge. in fact, friends made it a point to share transport related news with me (ha ha ha).
the thing i do not look forward is definitely the weather. also, i wonder how would i feel visiting the 'oh-so-familiar' places.
it's a pity that i am not 衣锦还乡. besides a year of personal experiences, i am actually worse than before i left. financially, i am many grands poorer. career wise - nothing. academically, i did classes that no one gives a damn. for my parents, i'm a nut case who chose to give up all the good things for a frivolous cause they cannot even understand. they had given up on me already.
i was wondering what will i say when friends asked me what have i been doing, or what's for the future. i dun even know myself. i only know starting life again in s'pore is the last option.
well, for a person who likes big picture, i guess the last sentence is all i need.
jeeze.... i am too paranoid....
# posted by nic @ 3:10 PM 
